equislee

use of mothers credit

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Need advise Please!!Several years ago I used my mothers name/credit to obtain some credit, she became aware of it afterwards and was fine as long as I could pay it. I was stupid and cocky and thought I would always have a good job and would be able to pay it off. Well of course I live in Michigan myself and my husband have gone through job loss and are struggling to get by on less then half of what we made 5 years ago. I have been making payments to my mother the best that I can with a job that pays 8/hr and my husband barely grossing 16/hr, and I have taken care of most of the past credit issues except for one that has gone to court. My mother and I stopped talking last fall---because she thinks that I have done all this on purpose to make her life miserable, and I keep on trying to tell her that I am sorry for my past mistakes but I can't undo them (well I am trying to pay them off as best I can) all I can do is try to make things better--I truely am not a bad person I just made a very very stupid mistake years ago. Well anyways I have tried to tell her and her lawyer friend how to handle this court situation but they are not listening to me, I told them that I had been through this before, you go to court agree on a payment plan, and I told her lawyer what I could agree to pay per month. But he wants to "talk to me". I am afraid to talk to him because I am afraid he will lambast me as a person and tell me how wrong I was to do what I did (when I already know all this, I just want to make things better, if I could go back in time and undo what I did I would but I can't, and I haven't won the lotto yet so I can't raise a majik stick and pay it all away), I am afraid of talking to him because once before when we used him to help me out of a situation he made a snide comment about not understanding why my parents would want to help me. I really am not a bad person just a person that made one stupid mistake, and then went through hell with unemployment,etc and I am truely trying to put everything back on the right track--but I am afraid of what the lawyer and my mother could do. I can make payments if they are small enough on this issue so I don't know what there is to "talk" about. The court appointment is Friday, the lawyer is a friend of hers from church and I really don't think he is a very good lawyer or knows credit law-- I have tried telling him via email- how to handle creditors/collections but he dosen't seem to take my advise. PLEASE ADVISE!!!!!! ASAP

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By using another person's personal info to obtain credit, you committed the crime of ID Theft/Fraud. The only recourse your Mother has to protect her rights is to file a police report and send that along with an affidavit denying the debt to the CRA's, CA's and OC's. This may or may not cause legal problems for you.

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Ok, thanks, that makes me feel a little better, I just don't know how to handle this, my mother has effectively alienated alot of people out of her life- she tells everyone that I am an only child even though she has two boys from another marriage one was killed in vietnam, the other she has disowned because he inherited more from her mother then she did even though her mother raised him---and I have seen her disown friends over 40 years for doing things she didn't approve of. I am working so hard to better my life and she doesn't believe me--my husband been going to school and working full time and will be done soon so he can look for a better job also, and I have been doing everything possible to better mine---trying to sell things I don't need anymore--but with the economy in Michigan it hasn't been easy. Sorry for venting on a subject not money.

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You may want to sit down with hubby and figure out the amount of money you can afford to put towards this debt. Make sure that it is an amount you can stick with for the long haul. When that is completed draft a letter (kinda like a settlement letter) to your mothers attorney friend.

If your relationship with your mother isn't good, most likely it won't be beneficial to meet with her friend (attorney). Treat this as a business agreement as you would if you were settling with a CA attorney.

Has your mother been sued for this debt that you ran up? If so make sure you have documentation of every payment you made on this card as well as given to your mother for this debt.

If the lawyer does try to go the ID theft route at least you will have documentation that your mother was aware of the debt.

Good Luck and stay away from that Lawyer!

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i believe in identity theft reports espeacially when dealling with asset :). however, be very carefull what you admit to here or anywhere. especially if what you say can be construed to show intent to commit fraud.

The penalties for the posible charges :

* stealing a financial device - 4 years in prison and/or a $2,000 fine;

* illegal use of a financial device - 4 years in prison and/or a $2,000

fine;

* unauthorized credit application - 4 years in prison and/or a $2,500

fine;

* using a computer to commit a crime(provided you used a computer to order or pay a bill) - 7 years in prison and/or a $5,000

fine;

* habitual felony offender - 1 1/2 times the maximum sentence on the

primary offense.

I am not try to be gloomy and i am willing to offer as much help as i can, However we also have to be realistic. You said you made payments to your mom, is this verifiable, can you prove you paid, (in a criminal case it could help to show your mom was aware and you to came to an agreement). Its just my thoughts but you may a big hurdle to get over.

But also keep in mind, for a police report (ID theft, your mom does not have to identify anyone,) so if mom dont hate you then your name dont get braught up. In that senario, does she have payments to the credit card, do they have her signature, or is this really a case of identy theft or has she called them and tried to work it out? I am sure a lot of people have input and i will continue to try to help you with what i have experienced.

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First of all.. what court situation. Is your mother being sued by the creditor?

Second, do not be afraid to talk to the lawyer, it will only make matters worse by avoiding the situation.

Thirdly, you commited a crime, you are not admitting that you are a bad person, just that you made a mistake. Unfortunately though, it is a bad one, and one of the few ways out and for your mother to not be liable is to turn yourself in to the authorities for identity theft, which does carry the penalties as described above.

Good luck, I hope it all works out for you.

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Yes I do have documentation of payments to my mother and have offered through my mothers lawyer to further make payments directly to the collection agency, so I really don't know what further there is to discuss, I think I agree with the other post that said to be cautious in this situation and not discuss or disclose any more then I have to. I have talked to the creditors before on this matter and their statement basically was they didn't care who used the card, it was taken out in my mothers name and ss so that is who they are holding liable.

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We have also discussed moving out of Michigan but with kids and a house its alot harder, although some people have just abandoned their houses. I don't think that my mother would do anything that would cripple me legally because I owe her quite a bit of money from when we were unemployed and if she were to cripple me legally it would make it hard for her to get the money I owe her and by the way have been paying monthly on-- and have the certified check stubs to prove it. Also even though our relationship has broken down--she thinks that the one mistake I made has made me a bad person, she loves her grandchildren and knows that anything she does to me could potentially damage any relationship she has with them.

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ok so now then i guess what is the real problem if you have been paying? So like magic said, Has your mom been sued? is the debt collection agency in contact or harrassing? are they violating the fdcpa, fcra, mich law? or is it really the OC? If i missed it, what is the ammount of the account? who is the OC or collection agency? what is with this court appointment on friday?

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I had been making payments directly to my mother since I owe her for other times she had helped me out when we were unemployed so I was making lump sum payments directly to her. She is being sued by asset acceptance, I am not sure if they are collections or bought the debt or what, since we are not getting along I have not seen any of the paperwork. The meeting on Friday is according to the lawyer a "mediation", and I told him how much and when I could make payments directly to asset acceptance for the meeting, I have been through these meetings before and know how and what they will be asking, I even told him to come to this site so he would know how to handle the collection lawyers, because in my mother case, even if they do find her liable, there is only so much they can do since she is retired and on a fixed income and we do have a record of payments and are willing to come to another agreement. I have been talking to this lawyer via email, but he has a bug up his butt about me calling him, I have told him before, I work in a warehouse, personal calls are discouraged and are monitored, I have to put in my time card number to make a personal call and will get charged for it, since I do have a computer monitor I can email and it is perfectly legal via the employee handbook. Also since this is an emotional issue for me, I don't want to get bullied or harassed into saying or doing something I will regret, I have done that with lawyers before, so I would rather converse by email so that any questions he has I have time to word them just right, and I have told him that I felt anything that we had to discuss could be done by email.

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IMO, if you do not show up for this "mediation", its just going to look like you are running. Your mom will be held liable and you will most likely lose your relationship, if any you have with her, asset accept. will file for garnishment after her trial and she will have to defend it putting her through more struggle. As I said before, if you want this over with, talk to your moms lawyer, he may not know much about credit law however, he probably knows more than you; unless you went to law school that is...:neutral: Just go get this over with, there are criminal charges here, its in both you and your moms best interest, Good luck.

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Don't judge another until you have walked two moons in their moccasins.

I didn't ask to be judged just for advise. The last two of you are submitting advise on how you view my mothers and my relationship and whether she or I are good people. You have not lived every day of my life with my mother and know what I have gone through with her---small compared to what you think I am making her go through. So screw you.

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ok, boy i hate to say it, but the more i am reading, it really is in your moms best interest to file identity theft report. That will tie ASSETS hands to now try to find the thief. But at least legally they could not come after your mom without having unrefutable evidence that your mom somehow used or benifited from this account, or agreed to let you have the account. I aint judging or taking sides as i dont know you or your mom. However with that being said, (my 2 cents, your mom should be told to protect herself) your young and have time to fix things legally, but as you said your mom is fixed income and probably doesnt want her bank accounts siezed.

Now even with that being said. if you meet with her lawyer and agree to sign a new contract to pay this debt (so asset has a new contract) (asset would have this ability and OC would not have any recourse as ASSET is (In Michigan) the owner of said junk debt.) your mom is relieved of responsibilty, and the burden is put back on your shoulders and without having to be prosecuted.

I say without being prosecuted cause if your mom says identity theft, they cant collect on her. if your in prison they cant collect from you. With a new contract for you to pay, they have a rope around your neck, and they are all happy.

I have no love for asset and would love to help you understand if they violated your rights, or your moms, but as of yet all i keep reading is the criminal stuff you may have to go through.

again all these are my thoughts not legal anything, a licenced attorney is whom you need to talk to. I know you know that, but i had to say it.

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also if i missed it, how much are we talking about? that could be a big factor if asset is going to run through hoops for $50.

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No one is judging you and no one said you were not a good person.. Just stating the obvious things to do, TALK TO AN ATTORNEY, this forum is for credit law, not identity theft criminal stuff... Dont take it that the wrong way, you just really need to seek counsel if you want this done correctly and should not rely on advice on a, let me add wonderful, "credit repair" forum. If you want to avoid jail, and if you want your mother relieved of any debt YOU incurred for the, get advice from legal counsel.. JMHO

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You have not lived every day of my life with my mother and know what I have gone through with her---small compared to what you think I am making her go through. So screw you.
This has nothing to do with the predicament you're in. Who did what to whom will not within the mother/daughter relationship won't make one lick of difference to the CA or to a judge. No matter how unpleasant and difficult your mother may be or may have been, her identity was stolen and that is all the law is going to care about. We're here to help, but you need to watch the attitude.

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Thanks for the info, and I normally don't have an attitude sorry, just under a lot of stress. Come to find out that is basically what the attorney was after was to get the debt reduced and put in my name to relieve my mother of responsiblity and come to a payment agreement. What made me mad was that he dragged this out and gave me very little (at best ) information. I already told him that I was willing to pay on this directly so I don't know what his hang up was, turns out the mediation was in his office this am, not the court house, I didn't know about this meeting even until Tuesday of this week and I am sure he knew about it a long time ago, he didn't let me know what his mediation plans were until less then 10 min before the meeting, which made me very suspicious-particularly since I don't care for the guy anyways. The way he handle all of this was horrible if he had come forward when he knew when the meeting was and let me know what his plans are this would have been handled a lot differently. I will never use him as a lawyer that is for sure. I have kept all of his horrible and sketchy emails so if it ever comes back that I was uncooperative--I can prove that I didn't know what was going on until the last minute. He emailed me literally 15 min before the meeting and asked me if I was going to respond to his mediation plans when I hadn't even been told what they were.

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The more I think about it the more I know I wouldn't have freaked out so much if the lawyer had just been forthright and said at the very beginning of the week--I have a meeting Friday on this matter this is what I plan on mediating--why all the clock and dagger stuff I don't know, it just made me freak, and made me want to cover my butt, I have gotten in trouble before with letting a lawyer know more information then I needed to.

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