Monday is going to suck!

[newbie7069]

I am taking our lab to be put down. He'll be 14 in about 3 months. He has arthritis really bad, and it has been getting progressively worse. He struggles to get up (and occassionally loses control of his bowels during the struggle), sometimes gets stuck and you have to go help him up. It looks painful to see him walk, which he very rarely does anyway.

I feel really guilty about it, because the descision was prompted by the move. We feel like it just isn't fair to him to put him through another move, plus we worry that the change to much colder weather conditions will make it even more painful and difficult for him.

I know that we are doing the most humane thing for him, it's just hard knowing that if we weren't moving this wouldn't be something that we would for a few more months.

[willingtocope]

Give him a hug for me...and take one for yourself. That's the toughest part about having four legged members of the family...we do tend to outlive them. DW and I are thinking about adopting one...we've got a house now, and could use the companionship. People at work have got some Blue Heeler / Shepard pups that would fit right in here.

[Hellard]

Seems like the right thing to do but i know its hard. are there kids in the house?

[newbie7069]

Yea there are kids. We are going to tell them that he passed away during the day while they were at school. I don't think they will be surprised. Like I said, he has been getting progressively worse.

We have to do it tomorrow because we are also having him cremated. It is supposed to take 3-4 days, and since we are probably leaving the state on Saturday don't have a lot of time. We are going to send him to be buried next to his parents. I know sounds crazy. But it is the only thing that seems remotely nice to me. We were there the day he was born, and he has outlived all of his litter mates.

Since DH is already in IN, one of his friends is having to come over to help me. I can no longer put him in the car. The friend offered to take him for me, but I feel like at least one of us should be there.

[rmuse00]

Sorry to hear that Newbie!

I will keep you guys in my thoughts and prayers.

[zfire]

You will be in my thoughts. I know how hard this is because I've been there.

This is family. You can rest assured that you are doing the kindest thing.

Z

[SecretAgentWoman]

You are doing the right thing, for HIM. I believe that whole heartedly. Take some time off that afternoon for family and remembrance/grief session.

[whocares]

Awwww newbie, I'm so sorry...I have a 17 year old myself...he is deaf and blind...the other dogs take care of him....and as long as he still goes outside he will stay...he looks like toto.

You are doing the right thing, if mine had arthritis I would make the same decision...

My prayers for you and your family

[Amerikaner83]

my DF has an old dog as well - a 16 YO Shih-Tzu that's legally blind and a little deaf...

I have an 11 YO Chow Lab mix thats starting to get the arthritis...

Its good that you're going to be with him when you go and put him down...my DF did that with her other dog and she's glad she got to be with her... it will hurt, but it's for the best.

[DocDon]

That's so sad, Newbie. I know how you feel.

Consider having him cremated, then spread the ashes at your new home so he'll be with you.

I know a few who have done that...

[newbie7069]

Thanks everybody for the kind thoughts.

Consider having him cremated, then spread the ashes at your new home so he'll be with you.

We decided that since we move so much (we actually are only planning on being in IN for 1 to 2 yrs), and there was no real place that held any significance for us, that the thing to do would be to send him back to Texas and bury him next to both of his parents. The couple that owned his parents are still good friends (DH was in their wedding--they were both in ours).

DH is going along with all of it, really to make me feel better about the whole thing. I just couldn't let the vet "dispose" of him---felt too callous after 14 yrs. I was frankly shocked at how much they charge to cremate, but wasn't gonna nitpick on the last money we are ever going to spend on him.

[Freak]

Our thoughts are with you and your family.

[Donna47129]

Aww...I'm so sorry!!

I feel for you, my lab is my sigy pic and I couldn't imagine.

You are doing the right thing so I hope that helps you find some peace...

[stefdr]

My heart goes out to you, I went through it with a Pit Bull/Sharpei mix when he was 14. he was getting bad arthritis in his hips, and then it was his memory was going as well. He was one of the most good natured and gentle dogs I ever had (Pit Bulls are not all vicious), I have a picture of him in the front yard playing with a litter of kittens the neighbors cat had. Taking him to the vet to have him put down was difficult, but I couldn't bear to see him in pain and confused.

[CelticGirl]

Newbie - I am so sorry for your loss.

I lost my lab this year. He was 10 and a half. Lung cancer - hit him hard and quick. It came as a real shock because he WASN'T getting blind or deaf or stiff... He never really became an 'old dog'. 14 years is impressive - he has had a good long life. This is your final gift to him.

There are lots of books out there to help kids deal with this. Like Mr. Rogers - When A Pet Dies.

My new pup has helped me to heal. (The only sad part is - I had always planned to already have a pup before he went - but as I never felt any urgency, I hadn't gotten one yet - so that is hard - I know he would have enjoyed her.) Of course - she is also wearing me out! It's been 10 years since I dealt with puppyhood! LOL

Consider visiting a shelter once you are settled in your new home. There are millions of animals that need good homes. He or she could help you and the kids heal and you'd be saving a life. It's not replacing your current family member - it's adding another one. He'll understand. He wants you to be happy too.

RainbowsBridge.com

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown...

[newbie7069]

Thanks again for the well wishes.

Celtic, your poem was beautiful!! We probably won't get another dog anytime soon. We got a boxer/great dane mix from a shelter about 2 1/2 yrs ago, so that's plenty for now.

It's been a tough day, but everyone is muddling through. The kids actually took it harder than I thought they would, but everyone seems to be processing it now. I've been quite more emotional today than I thought as well, but again....muddling through.

[CelticGirl]

That poem helped me a lot - getting through everything.

Allow yourself to be upset and grieve. And hug that Boxer/Great Dane mix! I bet he/she is a cutie!

[stefdr]

I had this forwarded to me in an email several months ago, and I still get a little choked up when I read it:

THE POSTAL SERVICE NO ONE HEARS ABOUT

Our 14 year old dog, Abbey, died last month.

The day after she died, my 4 year old daughter Meredith was crying and

talking about how much she

missed Abbey. She asked if we could write a letter to God so that when

Abbey got to heaven, God would recognize her.

She dictated and I wrote:

Dear God,

Will you please take special care of our dog,

Abbey? She died yesterday and is in heaven. We miss her very much. We are

happy that you let us have

her as our dog even though she got sick. I hope that you will play with

her. She liked to play with balls and swim

before she got sick. I am sending some pictures of her so that when you

see her in heaven you will know

she is our special dog. But I really do miss her.

Love,

Meredith Claire

P.S. Mommy wrote the words after Meredith told

them to her.

We put that in an envelope with two pictures of Abbey, and addressed

it to God in Heaven. We put our return address on it. Then Meredith stuck

some stamps on the front (because, as she said, it may take lots of stamps

to get a letter all the way to heaven) and that afternoon I let her drop

it into the letter box at the post office. For a few days, she would ask

if God had gotten the letter yet. I told her that I thought He had.

Yesterday there was a package wrapped in gold

paper on our front porch.

Curious, I went to look at it. It had a gold star card on the front

and said:

"To Meredith" in an unfamiliar hand. Meredith

took it in and opened it.

Inside was a book by Mr. Rogers, "When a Pet Dies". Taped to the inside

front cover was the letter we had written to God, in its opened envelope

(which was marked Return to Sender: Insufficient address).

On the opposite page, one of the pictures of

Abbey was taped under the words "For Meredith" We turned to the back

cover, and there was the other

picture of Abbey, and this handwritten note on pink paper:

Dear Meredith,

I know that you will be happy to know that Abbey arrived safely and

soundly in Heaven!

Having the pictures you sent to me was such a big help. I

recognized Abbey right away. You know, Meredith, she isn't sick anymore.

Her spirit is here with me--just like she stays in your heart--young and

running and playing. Abbey loved being your dog, you know. Since we don't

need our bodies in heaven, I don't have any pockets!-- so I can't keep

your beautiful letter. I am sending it to you with the pictures so that

you will have this book to keep and remember Abbey. One of my angels is

taking care of this for me. I hope the little book helps.

Thank you for the beautiful letter.

Thank your mother for sending it. What a wonderful mother you have! I

picked her especially for you. I send my blessings every day and remember

that I love you very much. By the way, I am in heaven but wherever there

is love, I am there also.

Love,

God and the special angel who wrote this after

God told her the words.

As a parent and a pet lover, this is one of

the kindest things that I've ever experienced. I have no way to know who

sent it, but there is some very

kind soul working in the dead letter office.

Just wanted to share this act of compassion.

[lavs412]

Wow! What a special person! It is so true when you hear that there are Angels walking among us!

How comforting this kind gesture must have been, not only for the child but for you, too.

[CelticGirl]

stephdr - I got that e-mail too (that's how I knew about the Mr. Rogers book). It makes me cry every time I read it.

The best part is - it's true, I checked snopes.

[rmuse00]

:waah:Very touching!!

The best part is - it's true, I checked snopes.

Don't ya just love that website?

I try not to foward anything I don't check out first.