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Financial Haikus

Chester P. Dexter

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There's no way I can top whocares' poem, so I'm going to post some haikus instead. (5-7-5, if anyone wants to add some)

Stock market hates me

Took my stocks and money, too

Better luck next year


How will you pay, ma'am?

Lots of cards in my wallet

They are all tapped out


We are Merrick Bank

Don't look at your APR

We are why you're broke


Do you need that meal?

You can eat peanut butter.

Try to dine at home.


Do not buy new shoes.

Look in your bedroom closet.

You should be ashamed.


Minimum payment

You will pay for many years

Pay it off instead.


Husband buys too much.

Hide all of his credit cards.

Tell him they were closed.

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  • 3 weeks later...

The new year has come.

January almost gone.

What does next month hold?

Added thermostat.

Save money in time, but found

Aluminum wire.

Stage two burn ban gone.

Back to heating with firewood.

Doesn't warm bedrooms.

Woke up to all fives.

Fifth horse in fifth race to win.

But it came in fifth.

Dear wife is pregnant.

This will make for our third child.

Unless it is twins.

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  • 4 weeks later...

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