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Anti-theft lunch bag

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Haa haa, I love it. We have the problem at mine and DF's work about lunches being stolen. His gets stolen every now and then and no one will touch mine since it follows mostly a vegan and gluten free diet which everyone says is psycho food. So, my food is always there when I want it. :D

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I NEED THAT BAG! None of the teachers will EVER mess w/ my lunch again; neither will my roommate! :)

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Years ago, my brother and I worked at this gas station. This one dipstick, we'll call Barney, kept taking people's lunches and drinks outta the frig. So, one of the guys who "worked" there, we'll call Fred, and I use the term "work" very loosely, decided it was time for action. My brother was there to see it go down. Fred walks into the "lunchroom", more like a walk-in closet with a table and chairs, and asks, "Heh, which one of you motherf***ers drank my Coke?" Silence. Fred then beams a big ol' smile and declares, "Aw, that's OK. I p*ssed in it anyway. Hee-hee-hee." Barney blurted out, "Aw man!" Problem solved.

At another job my brother worked, the company allowed them to drink, not only on lunch breaks, but while working. A lot of them were borderline alcoholics, and some not so much on the border, but oddly enough for years there weren't any problems of anyone getting completely plowed on the job and the work got done. Well, this one guy, whom they took to calling Bogart, would as the name implied bogart a beer but never paid. They all traded off and kept things pretty square. You fly, I'll buy. That sorta thing. Except for Bogart. So one day, a guy we'll call Don, decided he was gonna square things with Bogart. He knew what time Bogart left for the day, so he timed out his walk to the liquor store to get some beer. He asked Bogart, and of course Bogart said, "Yeah, bring me one." It was about a 1/4 mile walk to the liquor store, and for the entire 1/4 mile walk back Don shook up one bottle of beer. He arrived back just as Bogart was leaving, and Bogart walked to his car with the well shaken beer and drove home. The next day when Bogart came in, he walked right up to Don and said, "You son of a b*tch, you." Bogart had the beer in his lap, between his legs, driving, and when he opened it the entire bottle of beer shot up and all over the headliner of the car. Beer everywhere, but not so much as a swallow for Bogart. Problem solved.

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At one place I worked we had a lunch thief.

This thief had a particular love of tuna salad. If I brought in a tuna sandwich, you could guarantee it would be gone before my lunchtime came.

I had no idea who it was, but was determined to find out. One day I made a "tuna" sandwich which had not only tuna, but some freshly rotten fish I had picked up off the beach (was living in Ft Lauderdale at the time).

Sure enough, that sandwich was gone by lunchtime that day.

By 3 O'clock some guy was vomiting and went home.

Once we knew who it was, all it took was a little group effort to watch him and catch him the next time he stole a lunch. He got fired. I never told anyone there exactly how I figured out who it was; it was probably illegal.

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