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Things Not To Say to Police Officers

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Things Not To Say to Police Officers:

1. Are you Andy or Barney?

2. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

3. I thought you had to be in good physical condition to be a police officer.

4. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

5. I pay your salary!

6. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?

7. Hey, you must've been doing' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!

8. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?

9. Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!

10. I was trying to keep up with traffic. I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.

11. When the Officer says "Gee Son....Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"

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Of course I've been drinking!

Is it true that ALL cops love pastries?

Call them "Officer Bacon"

Do I have any fruits or vegetables? I don't know. Is cocaine a fruit or vegetable?

A hundred dollar fine? Well, I think George Washington can change your mind

Did you pull me over because of the drugs under the seat, the body in the trunk, or the burned out tail-light?

Do you have any idea who you're talking to?

I'm not as think as you stoned I am.

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"My parole officer doesn't like the idea of you pulling me over."

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No, really I am a police officer too!

Why?? and get yourself arrested for impersonating a police officer!!!! What a dumb a**

and yes I am a retired MD State Trooper, trust me all COPS aren't bad.

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I think I should start a thread and name it Dumb Sh*T Motorist Actually Say When Stopped By The Police! Hilarious!!!

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A man takes his new Corvette out for a high speed drive down the freeway on hot summer day. A Washington State trooper pulls in behind and turns on the lights to pull him over. The trooper approaches the drivers side window and says " If you can give me a reason for your speeding that I have never heard before, then I wont give you a ticket" The man quickly replied "12 years ago my wife left me for a trooper, I was thinking you were trying to bring her back"

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